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Positive Reinforcement

by Plovers

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1.
I rode the bus an hour and forty minutes I know because I counted every one And as the sun hid far below the black horizon I walked another mile 'til I was home The kettle boils while I cut up potatoes I'm so exhausted I can barely hold my head But when the lights are out I can't switch off my worry I'm imprisoned in the cotton of my bed Now I'm pushed against a chain-link fence And it cuts into my skin And I'm screaming but I don't make sense Cause I'm not Australian And I feel them tearing at my face While the end is closing in And no-one runs to my defence Cause I'm not Australian They stare at me when I am at the checkout They stare at me when they hear how I speak I felt that with some time it would get better But all I'm feeling is I'm tired and kind of weak When everybody's gaze weighs like an anvil It feels easier to stay just out of sight I'm so cut off from things that I've never belonged to And I'm having newer nightmares every night Where I'm pushed against a chain-link fence And it cuts into my skin And I'm screaming but I don't make sense Cause I'm not Australian And I feel them tearing at my face While the walls are closing in And no one runs to my defence Cause I'm not Australian It's eleven thirty seven in the morning And I came home as soon as I first got the call Ducked underneath the tape they placed across the doorway And stepped across the splintered wood strewn on the floor That broken glass once used to be my kitchen window That message sprayed in paint along my bedroom wall "Fuck off we're full Armani refugee pretender Your kind's not welcome in this country any more" And for a moment I was somewhere completely different And for a moment nothing had really changed at all I was still standing in the shell of what was shattered Back with the ruined husks of homes wiped out by war And I guess it feels like it was all for nothing And while I know that nothing ever is for sure It's hard to choose between my broken past and future When there's bodies strewn across the western shore
2.
Camp Nope 03:55
I'm don't really vibe with people, I just come and go Comfort isn't something that I know I don't go to visit people, I just stay at home I guess I'm happy with my status quo I don't vibe with people Trying to be different is denying who you are And there's a lot of faults within my heart But being something other than my habits and my scars Isn't something that I'm guilty of When somebody knows you they just get under your skin To feel around for something for their own So I've come to notice I don't want anyone in I've shut the doors and windows to this home I don't vibe with people I don't wanna, no I don't want to go out I don't wanna, no I don't want to go with you I don't wanna, no I don't want to see someone I don't wanna, no I don't want to meet someone new I don't wanna, no I don't want to go out I don't wanna, no I don't want to go with you I don't wanna, no I don't want to get around I don't want to leave the house but then you take me here and through the darkness I can see that someone is approaching, maybe I'll fall in love
3.
Dead Friends 04:11
Grab me by the throat and tell me that you think it's good for me As I'm sucked into the ground my hands are tied and bound by all your sympathy I flew closer to the sky until I realised I was drowning in the mud Statues reaching for ones beside them; the back of their shirts all stained with blood Future; can't synchronise the future It's just a matter of time before they break you, a matter of time before you're done It's just a matter of time before they break you, a matter of time before they've won It's just a matter of time before they break you, a matter of time before you're done It's just a matter of time before they break you, a matter of time before they keep you for their own Pull me out up of death's hour, take a breath above the sea Kill them with black blood and electricity, it doesn't look like anything to me I've seen bodies going cold, my skin is looking old as I'm gazing through the frame You knew what it meant to be to be there, I know nothing's gonna be the same Future; can't synchronise the future Here comes the one, comes the one, comes another one Yeah you stepped outside just to find all of your pieces were gone Fill those lungs, fill them up again Fill those lungs, fill them up again
4.
I don't want to get it together I don't want to follow my dreams I can't confront my emotions But I guess I can still look at memes I don't want to get it together I'll never conform to the rules I reject being exploited I'll never be somebody's fool Get it together I don't want to get it together My girlfriend is so fucking shit She cries every time that she looks in my eyes But I guess other women would quit I don't want to get it together I'm sick and depressed with my job I can't even get out of bed in the morning I can't put my hand on the knob I don't want to get it together There's nothing around within reach I feel like I'm constantly drowning And the fog is affecting my speech I don't want to get it together There must be some more that I'm owed I never did anything wrong as a kid Just got comfortable with saying no Get it together I'm going to be the one, I'm going to be the one I'm going to be the one that holds you back I don't want to get it together How fragile is your mental health? How much would it take until everything breaks and you're sitting there all by yourself? I don't want to get it together The effort is too much to make I don't think I have a particular talent I think that I'm just a mistake I don't want to get it together I just want to rip at the seams My head hits the ground and I'm thrashing around and I guess that it's all that it means I don't want to get it together And I couldn't if I fucking tried You said that you knew all about it When I said that I loved you I lied
5.
I've got a big fat dick swinging from my belt I've got a chiseled jaw, yeah it's the hand I was dealt I've got a body that is waiting just to make your dreams come true Yeah I'm too insecure to know I don't know best And I've got too much pride to let it off my chest Yeah I'm the man that you have always wanted standing next to you But I don't think I'm making sense And you don't get my point of view I'm feeling nervous and I'm tense I fuck up everything I do I'm sweating bullets from my palms And I can't look you in the eye There's nothing here inside my arms I guess I'm just another guy Yeah I'm the nicest guy, nicest one you'll meet So nice you'll see my face and want to cross the street I'll never take you where you really want to go I say I'll treat you right but I'll treat you wrong You've got to love a man that's got belief so strong Cause I contend not all men are full of poison, don't you know? I've got a big fat dick, it's so long and thick I contest your protest but confess I just feel better on the internet
6.
By My Side 03:08
Stay by my side and I'll give you the things that you want Stay by my side and I'll give you the things that you've missed out on It's like I'm under attack, it's like I'm under attack If you're cutting it off, it's not coming back It's like I'm under attack, it's like I'm under attack Go back home Stay by my side and you'll never be wanting again Stay by my side and you won't need your family or friends I've just gotta, I've just gotta get it out Way up there Up in the air Way up there Is a way out It's like I'm under attack, it's like I'm under attack Go back home

credits

released October 26, 2018

Performed, recorded, and engineered by Plovers in sporadic bursts between May-September 2018.
Drums loved by Aidan Ginn
Mastering by Aaron Dobos

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Plovers Melbourne, Australia

melbourne // post-something

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